Always Have A Mental Reverse Clause

Obstacles are a part of life things happen, stuff gets in our way, situations go awry. But nothing can stop the Stoic mind when it’s operating properly, because in every course of action, it has retained “a reverse clause.” What’s that? It’s a backup option. If a friend betrays us, our reverse clause is to learn from how this happened and how to forgive this person’s mistake. If we’re thrown in prison, our reverse clause is that we can refuse...

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Working Hard Or Hardly Working?

What are the chances that the busiest person you know is actually the most productive? We tend to associate busyness with goodness and believe that spending many hours at work should be rewarded. Instead, evaluate what you are doing, why you are doing it, and where accomplishing it will take you. If you don’t have a good answer, then st...

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Plato’s View

There is a beautiful dialogue called “Icaromenippus, an Aerial Expedition” by the poet Lucian in which the narrator is given the ability to fly and sees the world from above. Turning his eyes earthward, he sees how comically small even the richest people, the biggest estates, and entire empires look from above. All their battles and concerns were made petty in perspective. In ancient times, this exercise was only theoretical the highest anyone...

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It Is Well To Be Flexible

Shortly before his death, as victory in the Civil War was finally within his grasp, Lincoln told a story to an audience of generals and admirals about a man who had approached him for a high-ranking government appointment. First, the man asked if he might be made a foreign minister. Upon being turned down, the man asked for a more modest position. Upon being turned down again, he asked for a job as a low-level customs officer. Finding he could...

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Blow Your Own Nose

The world is unfair. The game is rigged. So-and-so has it out for you. Maybe these theories are true, but practically speaking for the right here and now what good are they to you? That government report or that sympathetic news article isn’t going to pay the bills or rehab your broken leg or find that bridge loan you need. Succumbing to the self-pity and “woe is me” narrative accomplishes nothing nothing except sapping you of the energy and motivation...

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This is What We Are Here For

No one said life was easy. No one said it would be fair. Don’t forget, though, that you come from a long, unbroken line of ancestors who survived unimaginable adversity, difficulty, and struggle. It’s their genes and their blood that run through your body right now. Without them, you wouldn't be here. You’re an heir to an impressive tradition and as their viable offspring, you’re capable of what they are capable of. You’re meant for this. Bred...

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When To Stick And When To Quit

In The Dip, Seth Godin draws an interesting analogy from the three types of people you see in line at the supermarket. One gets in a short line and sticks to it no matter how slow it is or how much faster the others seem to be going. Another changes lines repeatedly based on whatever he thinks might save a few seconds. And a third switches only once when it’s clear her line is delayed and there is a clear alternative and then continues with her...

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Life is a Battlefield

The writer Robert Greene often uses the phrase “As in war, so in life.” It’s an aphorism worth keeping close, because our life is a battle both literally and figuratively. As a species, we fight to survive on a planet indifferent to our survival. As individuals, we fight to survive among a species whose population numbers in the billions. Even inside our own bodies, diverse bacteria battle it out. Vivere est militare. (To live is to fight.) Today,...

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The Truly Educated Aren’t Quarrelsome

Socrates famously traveled around Athens, approaching the people he disagreed with most, and engaging them in long discussions. In these discussions or what record we have of them there are many examples of his conversation mates getting exasperated, upset, or aggravated by his many questions. Indeed, the people of Athens eventually got so upset, they sentenced Socrates to death. But Socrates never seemed to get upset himself. Even when talking...

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Finding The Right Mentors

We are fortunate enough that some of the greatest men and women in history have recorded their wisdom (and folly) in books and journals. Many others have had their lives chronicled by a careful biographer from Plutarch to Boswell to Robert Caro. The literature available at your average library amounts to millions of pages and thousands of years of knowledge, insight, and experience. Maybe your parents were poor role models, or you lacked a great...

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Mental Attitude

Success is in the blood. There are men whom fate can never keep down they march forward in a jaunty manner, and take by divine right the best of everything that the earth affords. But their success is not attained by means of the Samuel Smiles-Connecticut policy. They do not lie in wait, nor scheme, nor fawn, nor seek to adapt their sails to catch the breeze of popular favor. Still, they are ever alert and alive to any good that may come...

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The Entrance Into Society

The desire of pleasing is, of course, the basis of social connexion. Persons who enter society with the intention of producing an effect, and of being distinguished, however clever they may be, are never agreeable. They are always tiresome, and often ridiculous. Persons, who enter life with such pretensions, have no opportunity for improving themselves and profiting by experience. They are not in a proper state to observe: indeed, they look only...

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The Art of Conversation

The grand object for which a gentleman exists, is to excel in company. Conversation is the mean of his distinction, the drawing-room the scene of his glory. In company, though none are "free," yet all are "equal." All therefore whom you meet, should be treated with equal respect, although interest may dictate toward each different degrees of attention. It is disrespectful to the inviter to shun any of her guests. Those whom she has honoured by...

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One Man Power

Every successful concern is the result of a One-Man Power. Cooperation, technically, is an iridescent dream things cooperate because the man makes them. He cements them by his will. But find this Man, and get his confidence, and his weary eyes will look into yours and the cry of his heart shall echo in your ears. "O, for some one to help me bear this burden!" Then he will tell you of his endless search for Ability, and of his continual disappointments...

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Love and Faith

No woman is worthy to be a wife who on the day of her marriage is not lost absolutely and entirely in an atmosphere of love and perfect trust; the supreme sacredness of the relation is the only thing which, at the time, should possess her soul. Women should not "obey" men anymore than men should obey women. There are six requisites in every happy marriage; the first is Faith, and the remaining five are Confidence. Nothing so compliments a man...

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You Can Do It

There are two kinds of people in this world. The first looks at others who have accomplished things and thinks: Why them? Why not me? The other looks at those same people and thinks: If they can do it, why can’t I? One is zero-sum and jealous (if you win, I lose). The other is non-zerosum (there’s plenty to go around) and sees the success of others as an inspiration. Which attitude will propel you onward and upward? Which will drive you to bitterness...

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No Harm, No Foul

Word can have multiple meanings. One usage can be harsh and another might be completely innocent. The same word can mean a cruel slur or a pile of sticks. In the same way, something said sarcastically differs drastically from something that was pointed and mean. The interpretation of a remark or a word has an immense amount of power. It’s the difference between a laugh and hurt feelings. The difference between a fight breaking out and two people...

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A Trained Mind is Better Than Any Script

It would be nice if someone could show us exactly what to do in every situation. Indeed, this is what we spend a good portion of our lives doing: preparing for this, studying for that. Saving for or anticipating some arbitrary point in the future. But plans, as the boxer Mike Tyson pointed out, last only until you’re punched in the face. Stoics do not seek to have the answer for every question or a plan for every contingency. Yet they’re also...

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Just Do It

Indecision wastes a lot of time, and time is too precious to waste. If you’ll become a confident, decisive person, you’ll accomplish a lot more with less effort. No one learns how to hear from God without making mistakes. Don’t be overly concerned about errors. Don’t take yourself too seriously. You are a fallible, imperfect human being, but you can rejoice with thanksgiving because you serve an infallible, perfect God. Learn from your mistakes,...

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Laws of Magnetic Action

FIRST LAW: Relation of Power to "Tone". The effectiveness of magnetism in action depends upon harmony of "tone" between its possessor and any other person, and in securing such "tone"  harmony, on any magnetic plane, in any particular psychic state, at any given time, psychic and physical magnetism mutually cooperate. SECOND LAW: Magnetic Intention. The magnetic intention ("I INTEND MAGNETICALLY") intensifies otherwise unconscious magnetism, and runs through all the mass of general etheric vibrations like a theme in complicated music, imparting...

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Try The Other Handle

The famous journalist William Seabrook suffered from such debilitating alcoholism that in 1933 he committed himself to an insane asylum, which was then the only place to get treatment for addiction. In his memoir, Asylum, he tells the story of the struggle to turn his life around inside the facility. At first, he stuck to his addict way of thinking and as a result, he was an outsider, constantly getting in trouble and rebelling against the staff. He made almost no progress and was on the verge of being asked to leave. Then one day this very quote...

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Just Don’t Make Things Worse

The first rule of holes, goes the adage, is that “if you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.” This might be the most violated piece of commonsense wisdom in the world. Because what most of us do when something happens, goes wrong, or is inflicted on us is make it worse first, by getting angry or feeling aggrieved, and next, by flailing around before we have much in the way of a plan. Today, give yourself the most simple and doable of tasks: just don’t make stuff worse. Whatever happens, don’t add angry or negative emotions to the equation....

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No Shame in Needing Help

No one ever said you were born with all the tools you’d need to solve every problem you’d face in life. In fact, as a newborn you were practically helpless. Someone helped you then, and you came to understand that you could ask for that help. It was how you knew you were loved. Well, you are still loved. You can ask anyone for help. You don’t have to face everything on your own. If you need help, comrade, just a...

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Listening Accomplishes More Than Speaking

Why do the wise have so few problems compared with the rest of us? There are a few simple reasons. First, the wise seem to manage expectations as much as possible. They rarely expect what isn’t possible in the first place. Second, the wise always consider both the best and worst case scenarios. They don’t just think about what they wish to happen, but also what very realistically can happen if things were to suddenly turn. Third, the wise act with a reverse clause—meaning that they not only consider what might go wrong, but they are prepared...

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Brick By Boring Brick

Elite athletes in collegiate and professional sports increasingly follow a philosophy known as “The Process.” It’s a philosophy created by University of Alabama coach Nick Saban, who taught his players to ignore the big picture important games, winning championships, the opponent’s enormous lead and focus instead on doing the absolutely smallest things well practicing with full effort, finishing a specific play, converting on a single possession. A season lasts months, a game lasts hours, catching up might be four touchdowns away, but a single...

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Take A Walk

In a notoriously loud city like Rome, it was impossible to get much peace and quiet. The noises of wagons, the shouting of vendors, the hammering of a blacksmith—all filled the streets with piercing violence (to say nothing of the putrid smells of a city with poor sewage and sanitation). So philosophers went on a lot of walks to get where they needed to go, to clear their heads, to get fresh air. Throughout the ages, philosophers, writers, poets, and thinkers have found that walking offers an additional benefit—time and space for better work....

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Prepared and Active

Whatever happens today, let it find us prepared and active: ready for problems, ready for difficulties, ready for people to behave in disappointing or confusing ways, ready to accept and make it work for us. Let’s not wish we could turn back time or remake the universe according to our preference. Not when it would be far better and far easier to remake ourselv...

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Prepare Yourself for Negativity

You can be certain as clockwork that at some point today you’re going to interact with someone who seems like a jerk (as we all have been). The question is: Are you going to be ready for it? This exercise calls to mind a joke from the eighteenth-century writer and witticist Nicolas Chamfort, who remarked that if you “swallow a toad every morning,” you’ll be fortified against anything else disgusting that might happen the rest of the day. Might it not be better to understand up front—right when you wake up—that other people often behave in selfish...

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Stay Focused On The Present

When you look back at some of the most impressive, even scary, things that you've done or endured, how were they possible? How were you able to see past the danger or the poor odds? As Marcus described, you were too busy with the details to let the whole sweep of the situation crush you. In fact, you probably didn't even think about it at the time. A character in Chuck Palahniuk’s novel Lullaby says, “The trick to forgetting the big picture is to look at everything close up.” Sometimes grasping the big picture is important, and the Stoics have...

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The Long Way Around

Ask most people what they’re working toward and you’ll get an answer like: “I’m trying to become a [insert profession].” Or they’ll tell you they’re trying to get appointed to some impressive committee or position, become a millionaire, get discovered, become famous, whatever. Now you ask a couple more questions, such as “Why are you doing that?” or “What are you hoping it will be like when you get it?” and you find at the very core of it, people want freedom, they want happiness, and they want the respect of their peers. A Stoic looks at all...

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We Have But One Obligation

The Stoics believed, above all else, that our job on this earth is to be a good human being. It is a basic duty, yet we are experts at coming up with excuses for avoiding ...

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The Definition of Insanity

It’s been said that the definition of insanity is trying the same thing over and over again but expecting a different result. Yet that’s exactly what most people do. They tell themselves: Today, I won’t get angry. Today, I won’t gorge myself. But they don’t actually do anything differently. They try the same routine and hope it will work this time. Hope is not a strategy! Failure is a part of life we have little choice over. Learning from failure, on the other hand, is optional. We have to choose to learn. We must consciously opt to do things differently...

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Real Good is Simple

Is it that controversial to say that there are the things that people value (and pressure you to value as well)—and there are the things that are actually good? Or to question whether wealth and fame are all they are cracked up to be? As Seneca observed in one of his plays: “If only the hearts of the wealthy were opened to all! How great the fears high fortune stirs up within them.” For centuries, people have assumed that wealth would be a wonderful cure-all for their unhappiness or problems. Why else would they have worked so hard for it? But...

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Our Sphere of Impulses

Here we have the emperor, the most powerful man in the world, quoting in his diary the wisdom of a former slave (and from what we know, Marcus might have had direct notes from Epictetus’s lectures via one of his former students). That wisdom was ultimately about surrender and serving the common good—about the limits of our power and the importance of checking our impulses something every person in authority needs to hear. Power and powerlessness seem so rarely to enter the same orbit—but when they do it can change the world. Think about President...

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Don’t Let Your Attention Slide

Winifred Gallagher, in her book Rapt, quotes David Meyer, a cognitive scientist at the University of Michigan: “Einstein didn't invent the theory of relativity while he was multitasking at the Swiss patent office.” It came after, when he really had time to focus and study. Attention matters— and in an era in which our attention is being fought for by every new application, website, article, book, tweet, and post, its value has only gone up. Part of what Epictetus is saying here is that attention is a habit, and that letting your attention slip...

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The Mind is All Yours

The body can be ravaged by disease or injured or disabled in a sudden accident. It can be imprisoned or subjected to torture. The breath can suddenly cease because our time has come, or because someone has taken it from us. Breathing can grow labored because of exertion or illness as well. But up until the very end, our mind is ours. It’s not that the other two parts of life that Marcus mentions our body and our breath don’t matter. They’re just less “ours” than our mind. You wouldn’t spend much time fixing up a house that you rent, would you?...

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Turn It Inside Out

Stoicism is about looking at things from every angle—and certain situations are easier to understand from different perspectives. In potentially negative situations, the objective, even superficial gaze might actually be superior. That view might let us see things clearly without diving too much into what they might represent or what might have caused them. In other situations, particularly those that involve something impressive or praiseworthy, another approach, like that of contemptuous expressions, is helpful. By examining situations from the...

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Make Character Your Loudest Statement

The monk dresses in his robes. A priest puts on his collar. A banker wears an expensive suit and carries a briefcase. A Stoic has no uniform and resembles no stereotype. They are not identifiable by look or by sight or by sound. The only way to recognize them? By their charact...

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