There are several moments in all people’s lives when they start doubting their beliefs and abilities. They look at the things that they have accomplished yet dwell more on the failures. They look at the present and feel something is missing. People then try to find meaning and purpose in their lives. It is the lack of it that causes them stress.
1. Doubts and fears. Based on experience, people begin to question if they really are capable of accomplishing goals.
2. Failure. The stress is caused by conflicting thoughts and behavior. The person may have initially perceived that the goal was attainable yet did not successfully meet his needs. This results in feelings of guilt and apprehension.
3. Lack of meaning and purpose. Lack of confidence will result in a lack of motivation. Since the person feels that he is incapable of attaining some types of goals, he may lose sense of the whole meaning and purpose of his actions. This is where the question, “Why?” enters the picture. People start asking, “Why am I here?” or “Why can’t I be better?” or “Why did I fail?”
How Do You Control the Environment?
1. Answer your doubts and eliminate your fears. Since doubts are caused by feelings of uncertainty, it is best that you find out for yourself and stop wondering. Act and try to achieve short-term goals and tasks to know if you are capable at the moment of successfully accomplishing them. Face your fears by making decisions and setting goals one step at a time. If you fear that people won’t like your new attitude, try it for a week or a month and find out for yourself so that you will be able to determine and control your wondering thoughts and feelings.
2. Make failure a motivation. Self-development is a learning process that lasts for a lifetime. Learn from each mistake. Find out which areas made you fail and develop these in order do better the next time. You can only control your chances of success or failure if you accept your strengths and improve your weaknesses specifically.
3. Find meaning and purpose even in the smallest ways. Perhaps you have been stimulated externally for so long that you don’t realize that you have only been functioning in order to meet secondary goals. Internalize and derive meaning in your activities and behavior. Appreciate how people react and develop yourself in order to be intrinsically motivated and work out of passion.
What is the Goal and Response?
Your primary goal is to find meaning and purpose in your life and to foster a passionate attitude. By accepting your personality and improving your outlook, performance and relationships with other people, you gain a sense of “self” as a whole person. Your secondary goal is to cope with the physical demands of life. By being able to perform better in society, your basic needs of food, shelter, clothing, etc. will also be fulfilled.
The response is to keep learning mentally, physically and emotionally. This is an opportunity for you to develop your potential and see yourself as a competent and confident individual.
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